-

Sometimes I hate myself for being so straightforward.
It's like if there's something in my mind, it will, sooner or later, escape my mouth.

How do people swallow their thoughts?
I've hurt too many with my words, some of them really unintentionally and they really don't deserve that from me. Even if its from years ago, I can still remember those hurtful words I've said.


How do I become a more positive person? Sometimes I wonder, does my working environment suck (a little) or am I too pessimistic to handle everything?

I hate how I can dislike something so easily without trying hard to like it.
It's not natural is it? Hmm..

Fretzels

Hi, how's life.

Update from my previous post, I've found a job.

Yes, chose not to pursue a degree FIRST. I wonder if I'll regret this years down the road. 

My job's alright I guess, just that I'll meet people who really annoy me just by breathing and sorry, can't help it.

I don't know why someone can be so annoying, whatever he does or says annoys me to no fucking end. I've never loathed someone so much before, really. 

Anw, 16 more days to my confirmation date and I wonder if this is a right career to choose...

This is growing up. No more "What should I do when I grow up?" Once you leave school, you have to know. You have to work for it, you have to find something which can support you for the rest of your life. 

One wrong turn may cost you a few years down the drain which may then affect your future plans of getting married, having kids, yada.

So? No pressure. 

I planned to find a guy I love, settle down and get married at 25. Fat hope. Sis broke down everything for me and I guess I can say my bubble's pretty much burst at best. 

Step one: Find someone you want to spend forever with.

Step two: Work out your savings. Do you have enough money to get married? How much does it cost to hold a wedding? (And I really want a romantic dreamy wedding :( )

Step three: if you really want to get married at 25, you'll need a house which means you'll prolly need to start saving and start looking for one at the age of 22-23.

I've done Step one, but step two/three are pretty much impossible.

SINGAPORE, Y U SO HARD TO LIVE IN?

Or maybe, I should just ditch everything and start selling char kway teow. 

The father would be pleased. 

On a side note, here's a pic of the cute bf and I.

Thanks for having me. 

Words

Ok I've been in a terrible state ever since my rejections from SIA interview. Twice on Round 1.

Ever since then I've developed SOME KIND of phobia for interviews, like I'd feel that its destined to go down the drain...
And my latest rejection proved me right anyway. I applied for and interviewed at a hotel awhile back and they told me they will notify me within 14 days IF I was shortlisted. Yesterday was the 14th day.

Sigh.

I know I've said it before, but I've never felt so lost in my life. No aims, no goals, no nothing.
I know that if I want something, whining and complaining will be the last way to get to it. But the problem is I don't even know what I want, really.
I've been ranting about this to E so many times I think it's time to give him a break (hence this post)? Yep. But it doesn't mean that he didn't offer me any fruitful advices like "Start working for a couple of years and you'll know exactly where to go!" or "Don't worry, B, the opportunity is not here yet."

What will I do without him?

Alright back to serious business. I just sent out 3 more resumes today for concierge/front office positions which I have no prior experience in. See, I've always been working in F&B... I felt it's time for a change.

So, fingers crossed and let the wait begin (again)!

Yesterday

Yesterday, I went to send my favourite Japanese girl off. Ok I only have ONE Japanese friend actually.
Ann, I don't know if you remember but I promised to keep this blog alive so that you can access it and get some updates of my boring life while you're in Japan. I'll make an effort to do so!

Can't wait to grow up, earn some $ and fly to Japan and meet up with her! :D

Wander

It's been more than 4 months since my last update and I'm guilty for not being a frequent blogger.

Life had been mundane for me but what's new?

So I finished Poly and got my Diploma. Finally, after three breathless years. So much has happened in the three long years, things I regretted and things I truly felt happy for. I guess that's life.

I wish I knew what I want in my future because right now I'm a lost sheep with absolutely no directions and no freaking idea what I want to do.

I hope things will work out eventually. Because they always do.. right?